That jokes

Nun

  • One afternoon, a man was walking to a bar after work. Across the street, an Irish nun stood there waving her arms at the man. "Look at this poor drunkard! The Lord does not love him! He will be sent to Hell!" the nun shouted.

    The man walked over to the nun. "Hey! I had a hard day at work! I was going to get ONE beer! Have you ever even tried a drink before?" the man asked. The nun looked down and shook her head. "Well, if you tried it, you would probably like it! Would you want to try something?" the man asked. The nun replied, "Okay, only one thing."

    "What would you like?" asked the man. He offered her beer and whiskey, but she declined. "How about a little gin?" the man concluded. "Okay, sure. But, can you ask them to put it in a mug so people don't see what I'm drinking?" asked the nun.

    "Fine," the man walks into the bar and waves to the bartender. "Hey, can I have a bottle of beer and a bit of gin? Also, can that be in a mug?" asked the man. The bartender looked up, with fury in his eyes. "Don't tell me that damn nun is out there again!" the bartender said.

  • 0
  • Pokemon

  • I wanna be the very best, like no one ever was.

    To bitch them is my real test, to train them is my cause.

    I will travel across the land, searching far and wide.

    Fuse Pokemon to UnderStand, the power that’s inside.

    Poke him on! Gotta train them all it’s Fru and me, All I know is my dress tiny, Poke him on! Yeah, you’re my best friend, In a world you must defend, Poke him on! Gotta train them all my shirts so true, My outrage will flush us through. You bitch me and I ditch you, P-O-K-E-M-O-N!!! Gotta train them all, Gotta train them all! Pokemon!

    Snow

  • Snover1: You can't pass through Snow Way!

    Squirtle: Why can't I pass through Snow Way?

    Snover1: There's snow in the way.

    Snover2: Yeah, you can't get past through the snow while it's on the way, to continuous.

    Squirtle: What? There's snow in here the whole time. What is this? Snow Society?!

    "AAAAARRRGGH!!"

    Squirtle: Who is that?

    Snover2: That is Snow.

    Squirtle: What?! That giant snow tree thing is Abomasnow!

    Snover2: Oops! Don't be a Halt!

    "Haaaaaaaaallllltttt!!!"

    "Aaaaaauuuuggghhhh!"

    Snovers: That was a JOKE, Squirtle be FROZEN, just let it go, let it go!

    Depression

  • Me: Hey, how are you?

    Depression: I'm doing fine. We are just looking for a home :3

    Insomnia: Mommy, can we get a home?

    Anxiety: Insomnia, wait for mommy to finish.

    Depression: Anyway, here is my resume!

    Me: Okie, thank you. Ok... mhmmm... WOW! Okie, this is a nice resume! (Didn't Read it...)

    Depression: Also, I have two more friends that want to move in too!

    Me: Ok, and their names?

    Depression: Their names are: PTSD and Trauma!

    Me: Ok, they seem fine (Doesn't know about them)

    Depression: Okie, here is the money (a penny :(). Thank you, we will call you if we need anything.

    Me: Ok, see you soon! :3

    Me now hates my life. :)

  • 1
  • Pokemon

  • POKEMON THEME SONG JOKE: I wanna be the berry best, like no one ever was.

    To bitch them is my real pest, to brain them in my toss. I will gravel across the land, perching war and wide. Fuse Pokemon to under-strand, the lower that's in psyche.

    Poke him on! Gotta joke them all it's Fru and me, All I know is my dress tiny, Poke him on! Yeah, you're my pest friend, In a world you must de-blend, Poke him on!

    Gotta joke them all my shirts so true, My outrage will flush us through. You bitch me and I ditch you, P-O-K-E-M-O-N!!!

    Gotta joke them all, Gotta joke them all!

    Poke him on!

  • 3
  • Rainbow

  • So I found out a rainbow is basically where a guy ejaculates in a female's mouth and she swallows her period juice and they both kiss each other, swishing it together in each other's mouth, and it forms a rainbow.

    And a strawberry shortcake is basically where a dude ejaculates on a female's face and then punches her in the nose, causing her to bleed. That's why it's called a strawberry shortcake.

  • 0
  • Name

  • A guy starts chatting to a pretty woman at a party.

    Seeing that she didn't back off, he asked her name. "Carmen," she replied. "That's a nice name," he said, warming up the conversation. "Who named you, your mother?"

    "No, I named myself," she answered.

    "Oh, that's interesting. Why Carmen?"

    "Because I like cars, and I like men," she said, looking directly into his eyes. "So what's your name?" she asked.

    ‘BJ Titsngolf’

  • 8
  • Pistol

  • Me: How does this thing work?

    ForTnite kid: Oh, you don’t know how to use a pistol? Look, I’ll show you.

    ForTnitekid: *shoots foot*

    Me: That wasn’t a very good demonstration.

  • 1
  • Teacher

  • If you have a teacher who is a Karen, comment what the worst thing that they did to you or your entire class. I know this isn’t a joke, but why not?

  • 3
  • Baby

  • Wife: “I want another baby.”

    Husband: “That’s a relief, I also really don’t like this one!”