Tell jokes

I could tell my cousin you are so annoying, but she told me first, so we both said it at the same time. 🫣🤣😂

Bored? Run over an orphan with your car! What are they going to do, tell their nonexistent parents?

You can tell if a woman is angry if she is holding a gun.

Knock knock. Who's there? Well, I will tell you who's not there: my dad.

I'm 5'6", and my mom is 5'1" and 1/2. She always says she's going to get a suicide vest and fill it with bricks and squish me. I tell her good luck.

And when she tries to hug me, she says, "You're too fucking tall, kid," so I usually reply with "Go get a stool then."

My mom was telling me about different pastas. So many pastabilities!

A priest and a rabbi were hanging out at a playground. The priest waves to a kid to come over and tells the rabbi, "Let's screw this kid."

The rabbi looks confused and asks, "Out of what?"

At weddings my mom always tells me I’m next. So I say the same to her, at funerals.

When my family goes to weddings, my senior relatives tell me things like “You’re next!” So I started doing the same to them at funerals.

What type of jokes do you tell an orphan?

Family jokes.

Your eyebrows and hairline are so far apart that when Dora the Explorer went and found your hairline and was trying to find your eyebrows, the map couldn't even tell her.

I would tell you a joke about meat, but the stakes are too high.

Why do orphans like tigers? I don't know, you tell me.

If you make a joke about me, I'll tell my mom.

The joke I'm telling is my brother, Joey.

I am not telling you twice, your mouth stinks, so go burn your house down like a crazy mad woman, and I will call the cops like, "WTH," because you are so fat.

Tell rumors about me, but please don't say I'm in a love relationship.

You know, people always tell you to stand up for yourself. Why didn't anyone tell the World Trade Center that? 🤔

Tell me a joke about my hairline.

No, because he don't got one, feel like Donald Trump, it don't move.

Did your dad ever tell you he was going to get milk... But then never came back lol? 😅