Tell jokes
Sex is like show and tell: you show your pussy and dick, and then you tell each other how you feel.
Rape: The only crime where you have to tell the victim they couldn't do anything even if they could run or say something, then after, are told rapists stop them doing something about it.
Last year, I got kicked out of the Hospital for telling COVID patients to stay positive!
What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?
A family portrait........
You might say I'm mean but what are they gonna do..... tell their parents?
Wait..........
Why is Lucas so weird? I don't know, you tell me.
What did the mom tell her son when he asked for a bowl of cereal? "Sorry your dad wasn't came back with the milk yet."
Man: Okay, tell me a joke without the expense of anyone's feelings.
Me: Okay, so an Asian...
One day I caught my sister talking to my girlfriend, and she said, "You never told me you're lesbian." I said, "No, not at all." My girlfriend asked, "Why did you not tell her?" and I said, "Because every time I bring a girl home, I hear too much noise in her room, and I never get the chance to kiss them because she's cleaning the trash." She said, "Yeah, the trash is her junk."
Me running out of the hospital after telling COVID patients to stay "positive."
If you have a bad day, go tell an orphan to find his parents. He will be searching all day.
Why can orphans give all you people posting all these stupid orphan jokes over and over again a good kick in the face?
Well, what are you gonna do, tell their parents?
P.S. Stop posting stupid orphan jokes over and over again.
Teacher: What's 55 flowers plus 67 flowers?
Kid: A garden?
Teacher: Did I tell you that you're adopted?
Why is it okay to hit an orphan?
It’s not like they can tell their parents.
Hey guys! Ello here with an update!
I know I haven't been doing a lot of jokes lately, so I will make sure to do that, but I have something to say! I am going to Disneyland today!! So here is the plan. Today we are going to leave around 2 and go to Downtown Disney for dinner and check into our hotel and stuff like that. Then we are going to wake up bright and early tomorrow and go to Disneyland and stay 'til midnight, and then on Monday we are going to California Adventure! I am missing school on Monday! I'm so excited! And don't worry, I will make sure to tell you guys all about it when we get back. Love y'all!
I was born and raised in Newcastle.
My grandfather used to tell me stories about Penaldo, a goblin from Portugal that travels to England when Newcastle is playing. He scores a tapin and then disappears until the next Newcastle game. I still have nightmares that he’s in our stadium.
Recently I visited a restaurant in Crotone. When I was done eating, I told the waitress I was “Penaldo” with my food. She instantly knew that I was finished with my food.
My mom tells me and my sister to stop fighting. "Mom! You and Dad need to stop!"
Q: How can you tell if a Western is gay?
A: All the good guys are hung.
My dad tells me and my sister to stop arguing, so she elbowed me in my damn nose.
So guys, I have a friend who is named Sarah, and I was riding bikes with her the other day, and she told me she is gay. I totally support her. I love that she is open about it and not scared to tell people about it. I hope you guys can support her too! I love you all! :)))