Tell Jokes

I love telling good news to my patients, like they survived the crash but their family died.

I'm thinking about telling my daughter there's a ghost in the house. At least then I can wear a bed sheet at night and fuck her without her being suspicious.

Does anyone still look at this? If you do, tell me if I should make more jokes :)

The joke about the giraffe’s neck is far too long to tell.

Your secret is safe with me. I walnut tell a soul.

I’d tell you a secret about peanut butter, but you might spread it.

I have a pun, but I will nut tell you!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Walnut. Walnut who? I walnut tell you. It’s a secret.

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Butter. Butter who? I butter not tell you.

So, there is this button. There's a 50% chance you get a million dollars. There's a 50% chance that you turn into a turtle. Make them press the button, and if they give the money, you just push the orphan over, take their money, and run away because who are they going to tell? Their parents?

The bell rings, and Ana was about to leave, but the teacher said, "The bell doesn't dismiss you, I do."

The next day, Ana was late, and the teacher asked, "Why are you late?" Ana replied with, "The bell doesn't tell me when I should arrive, I do."

I can tell a joke :)

Twinkle, twinkle, there's a car Coming like a shooting star. I will stand in the way. I will not be seen again. Are you happy I am dead? Now you made it to the end.

Little Johnny brings his cat to school, and then the teacher asked him why. Little Johnny says, "Because I heard my dad tell my mom I'm going to eat that pussy up when the kids leave!"

If anyone can see Alya KUHL please tell me! I love and miss her...

When you tell the men in the suits you can see that the demons of your sins are watching you...

But they know you're blind.

Why can you slap an orphan?

Are they going to tell mommy?

Did I ever tell you my father should have been on the plane that crashed into the Twin Towers?

But that's just my opinion.

Did you know the F in orphan stands for family... Oh wait, haha.

We should stop making jokes about orphans before they tell their parents... Oh, continue.

Bro, stop. You guys are saying the same jokes over and over. If you're gonna tell a 9/11 joke, just go laugh about the Great Thumps.

A son tells his father, "I have an imaginary girlfriend."

The father sighs and says, "You know, you could do better."

"Thanks Dad," the son says.

The father shakes his head and goes, "I was talking to your girlfriend."