Technology jokes
What is the difference between an American and a computer?
An American doesn’t have trouble shooting.
Me when my girlfriend comes home, I check her phone and there are 100 texts from a different guy asking her out, and her text says yes.
Get the whip, you're out!
How did Steven Hawking die?
He lost internet connection.
Dad: Ok kids, this selfie will just be me! *screen cracks*
How many Microsoft programmers does it take to change a light bulb? - None, they declare darkness to be the new standard.
Flip 1134 over on a calculator.
Happy holidays!
How did Steven Hawking die?
His wife needed a charger and plugged him out.
What happened to the alligator when he held a GPS?
He became a navigator.
What time is it when you can drive home from phone?
What is the difference between an orphan and a phone?
A phone has a home button.
What's the difference between you and the internet? People want a connection from the internet.
How do you make a dishwasher work again?
Smack her ass and say "get back to work!"
Why was Stephen Hawking always like this 🫠?
Because he didn’t have emojis on his computer.
What happens when Stephen Hawking dies? Windows plays the shutdown music.
My sister said download "Among Us" on my iPad, so I did. Then she taught me to play. Then she told me a code and told me where to put it, and I typed in the code.
Then she was the imposter, and I was a crewmate, so I was sticking with her, and she killed me when we made it to the medbay.
I was excited to hear Apple might start selling its own cars until I learned they wouldn’t support Windows.
What does a phone and a grandma have in common? They both die.
What's the difference between them? If you shove something up your grandma's ass, she won't come back to life.
What's the difference between Paul Walker and my computer?
I care when my computer crashes.
My favorite website.
What do you call a bored robot?
A “sigh”-borg.