Technology jokes
Heard Stephen Hawking is in a new movie and that the theme tune is absolutely banging. Think the opening line goes something like, “They see me rolling, they hating.”
What did Google Translate say to Siri?
"Why are you so Siri-ous?"
I met a man named Jebidiah on Xbox Live.
I heard the man who invented Autocorrect died; may he rest in peace.
What can a mouse do?
He clicks.
What will Donald Trump build in our devices?
A firewall.
If you want any pictures of cheese for your laptop, I've got enough to Philadelphia.
When the phone is ringing, Dad says, "If it's for me, don't answer it."
If I'm the night guard at the Samsung store, does that make me a guardian of the galaxy?
If you give a gator a GPS, does that make it a navigator?
Yo mama is so fat, when she came on this website, the whole server crashed!
American: How do you use a PC?
Amish: We use a potato.
How does Stephen Hawking charge his computer?
How does Stephen Hawking have sex? Keyboard sex!
What is the first thing the disabled download on iTunes?
"They see me rolling, they hatin'."
Science flies you to the moon, but religion flies you into skyscrapers.
Why does Stephen Hawking always say he's got so many bitches?
Because he is never around Siri.
When you try to close a Google ad because it was covering content, but it was covered by "Ad closed by Google."
A man bought a brand new iPhone but returned it, why?
The apple was already bitten.
What does a robot do after a one night stand?
He nuts 'n bolts!
Stephen Hawking and his wife Siri’s favorite place to eat is Meals on Wheels!