Why did 10 kill itself?
Because it was between 9/11.
How did the inkjet printer kill himself?
He drank cyan-ide.
What's the difference between me and a corpse? I mean, I'm not dead... yet, right?
"I miss you.
Being happy was never that hard without you..."
Someone's dad: You think he/she wants to join me? I didn't get the milk...
"Do you have a noose?"
"Nose?"
"Yeah, noose- nose... I heard yours was stuffed lately--haha."
"I actually smell something--like a corpse. Is it you?"
"No."
*Dying on the inside has never been so detectable.*
I told an emo kid that we were going to hang (hangout), but they took it too literal.
If I died and went to heaven, do you think I’d be friends with Prince?
The only thing that makes me want to stay alive more is the thought that Prince would hate me.
Shout out to the terrorists, your year is starting off with a bang!
I wanna take drowning lessons, but I can't find more than one session.
I'm 5'6", and my mom is 5'1" and 1/2. She always says she's going to get a suicide vest and fill it with bricks and squish me. I tell her good luck.
And when she tries to hug me, she says, "You're too fucking tall, kid," so I usually reply with "Go get a stool then."
Person: What's your perfect date look like?
Me: Oh, just hanging around in a tree.
Wanna suck my dick?
No? Well then I'm gonna go hang.
What type of people have the world record for most stories read in the shortest amount of time?
Emos, some of them are still in the air.
What is the difference between a Walking Dead and you? He doesn't feel pain.
I can get my grandma 50% off from her groceries by just scanning my wrist.
What did the tree say to the depressed kid?
"Stop hanging around."
What's the best way to tell your friend you hate them? Option 1: Kill them. Option 2: Walk away. Option 3: Kill each other.
Me: Why can't I just kms and leave them the pain?
What's the difference between Rorochan and skydivers?
One does it for the cash, the other for the views.
Guys, should I do it? You know what I mean.
Me die.
