Suicide Jokes

If I'm still single by Christmas, Santa won't be the only one jumping of a roof

My mom tells me when I get into an argument with her that she brought me into this world and she can take me out. Some times I wanna tell her that I can do that for her.

I know I'm valuable I come with a barcode

When you get caugh about to shoot up the school. *slowly puts AR to chin*

Dark jokes are like a new day suicidal people don’t get it

Muslims commit suicide to go to Paradise and get 72 virgins... I just go to the local primary school

I talked to a future suicide bomber, I told him, "ISIS ain't got Sh** on me because I Planted a bomb and lived."

I get so many thing stuck in my head, though, unfortunately none of them were a bullet.

[Them]: "Don't you think you'll feel ashamed of all the suicide jokes you've made when you get older?"

[Me]: "When I what?" 0-0

Technically suicide is murder and murder is ilegal so if I kill myself my body should go to jail

People complain we are over- populated. Well then if we committed suicide then why do they be sad. It's one less person to think about. Why complain about it when in the end we become sad peoples?

What do u call a dwarf suicide bomber? A party popper

Why did Kayla go to the river when she was sad??

To drown herself

What do leaves and suicidal people have in common? Nothing, one falls from the tree and one doesn't

What does a relationship and suicidal thoughts have in common? They’ll both end soon.

Are you a toaster because I want to take a bath with you