Suicide jokes
Me: Hey dad, I'm in debt, my dick got cut off, I have depression, and I am suicidal!
Dad: Hi in debt, my dick got cut off, I have depression, and I am suicidal! I'm dad!
Why couldn't Bob hang himself?
Because he had no arms to tie a knot. :'-)
Suicide is illegal because it's a crime to destroy government property.
What was Jim Jones' favorite drink?
Killer Kool-Aid.
I believe "Self-Baptism" is a nice way of saying "Failed Suicide Attempt."
Why did Kayla go to the river when she was sad?
To drown herself.
These jokes cheered me up from suicide. This is amazing material. God bless all of you.
What has more brains than Kurt Cobain?
The wall behind him.
I don't know if this is a joke or a question, but:
If killing yourself sends you to hell, where does sitting in the waiting room get you?
To the guy asking what joy I find in suicide jokes, the answer is simple. I make suicide jokes to cope with my crippling depression. Must be working, cause I'm still here.
Please, can someone comment on this post to explain what satisfaction you get from joking about such serious issues?
Stop joking about suicide, it's not funny. You people must be so ignorant to be able to joke about such serious issues that you clearly are uneducated on.
kys
There's nothing more depressing than a failed suicide attempt.
The more suicidal people there are, the fewer suicidal people there are.
What do you call someone who wants to commit suicide by jumping off a building?
A cliffhanger.
I saw a man sitting on the ledge of a bridge the other day, and asked him what was wrong. He responded with nobody loves me, so i told him that may be true but you dont wanna kill yourself you want to die of old age, or at least be murdered, suicide is for the weak. he responded with your right so I pushed him over the bridge, and he died of murder
Who's the fastest reader?
Me, 'cause I'll be jumping off so many stories.
What is the best cure for aging?
Suicide.
What makes suicide illegal?
Getting caught.