If a simp is staring at you, cover your mouth (they'll stop looking).
Knock knock. Who's there? Knock knock. Knock knock who? I'll knock knock you out if you don't stop.
Just watched an upsetting video. Please retweet. #Stop The Make-A-Wish Foundation.
Two cyclists stop on a bridge. One cyclist says to the other, "Can you see that forest over there?"
The other says, "No, the trees are in the way."
Why did Naruto stop trying to get at Sakura?
Why?
Because it would be useless. :)
I saw my midget neighbor at a bus stop.
"Jump in, I'll give you a lift home," I said.
"Bugger off!" he shouted back.
"What an ungrateful little man," I thought as I zipped up my backpack and continued my walk.
HELP! HELP!
TELL THE PRIEST TO STOP TICKLING ME!
1: Hey.
2: What?
1: We're outta paint.
2: *HMM*
(And that's how stop signs have extra paint.)
Mine never stops.
I was gonna stop for the cops, but I ran because I was high (the song don't copyright me plz).
We need to stop making orphan jokes like this because they aren’t mean enough. We need more cruel jokes.
You are so ugly, when the Joker saw you, he stopped laughing.
What did the tree say to the depressed kid?
"Stop hanging around."
Last night I had sex and she said, "Stop talking about s***, OMG!" and I made her scream so loud she said, "Her balls hurt!"
Stop being disrespectful to all those people and their parents. Oh, I forgot, they don't have any parents.
Why was the rapper bad at baseball?
Because he couldn't stop DROPPING HITS.
"Daveon, stop screaming for help because I broke your kneecaps!"
I should probably stop making emo jokes.
They just don't seem to cut it anymore.
My friend was getting bullied so I went over and asked him to stop. It went a little bit like this:
Me: Dude, leave her alone. Him: Beat it, b*tch. *lots of arguing and swearing* Me: Ya know! The smartest thing that ever came outta your mouth was probably a penis. Him: *walks away*
Once, there was a woman who had a husband and a dog. The husband dies.
The dog would always sleep under the bed, and when the woman would go to sleep, she'd put her hand down, and the dog would lick it to say she/he was alright. One night, it was thunderstorming. She put her hand down and the dog licked normally. She heard the dog whimper, so she put her hand down like normal, as the dog always does, he/she licks her hand.
Then she heard dripping coming from the bathroom, so she went to go stop the leaking that might be coming from the tap, but the tap wasn't on, nor was it dripping. She turns on the light and looks up at the roof to see if the roof was leaking but turns out her dog was hung by its head above the bathtub.
On the mirror it said, "Humans can lick too," in the dog's blood.
This is a true story, don't be afraid to look it up!
