Stop jokes
So, today is my birthday. Today, I am 13, but yesterday I am going to turn 10. But I am not even going to school to know the number ten, because one time at 10 p.m. in the morning it was so cold in my hot room, so I went outside to drive my car. But I stopped because the light turned green. I was taking a bath in the front of my car, and it didn’t have a bin, so I am taking a sh$t.
Brother 2: We have these weird circles on the street! Government is tracking us!!!
Brother 1: They are just to sense cars so they can change lights. And it's the government.
Brother 2: Then why are there two in the left turn lane?
Brother 1: So one car isn't always going left and stopping the others.
Brother 2: Then why are they one car apart? Oh, to have three people going.
Brother 1: Correct. When I see one car on the first, I go on the second so my light changes.
Brother 2: You monster.
Brother 1: I wonder if they trigger by weight?
Brother 2: HA. Yo mama would trigger the sensor.
Brother 1: ARG. It's OUR MAMA you're disrespecting.
Mother (brother 1): What's going on boys? *looks in mirror* HOLY SH@& SHE IS PRETTY!
Brother 2: I think you should take your pills.
Brother 1: Found them.
*imaginary mother and brother fade away*
Thank you ELECTROBOOM for inspiring this joke/sh!t. Go subb to him.
Btw the (1) means it is just imaginary brother one acting like another brother.
I have two things I wanna say:
1. When people swear, stop taking it so fucking literally. If someone calls you a bitch, they're not calling you a female dog. If they call you a cunt, they're not calling you a woman's private part, they are calling you either an idiot, scaredy cat/baby, or something along those lines, ffs.
2. wtf
What’s better than swinging a dead baby in circles over your head with a 5 foot rope?
Stopping it with a shovel.
The way to stop school shootings is to give children an RPG.
I should probably stop making jokes about 9/11.
My dad died to it, he was a great pilot.
So Little Johnny saw a robbery, so he tried to stop the robber. To the robber's surprise, he was amazed. So Johnny got 20 shots to the head. The End.
What makes Stephen Hawking and your dumped girlfriend similar?
They can't stand up for themselves.
People are arguing about stopping orphan jokes.
Me: m e h. i d o n t c a r e.
Stop it why offends... asf.
Bully: *Bullies kid*
Orphan: Stop!! *Cries*
Bully: What are you gonna do? Tell your parents?? XD
Orphan: :/
So I told an orphan if her mom is hot, he wouldn't stop crying.
When your little brother knocks your two Jenga towers you made with his toy airplane,
You: "Hey, stop trying to recreate the Twin Towers!"
Dude, people gotta stop letting 9/11 jokes fly around like bro, you're gonna make my brain explode!
This is not a joke, Tom. I'm asking you to leave me alone, stop being sexual, I don't like you.
Your mom is so stupid, she stopped at a stop sign because it never said "go."
Why would a cannibal stop eating people?
If they got fed up with them.
Hiii everyone, I heard from many people that they want to join the "stop orphan jokes" group. Who wants to?
Addison Banks Age (8)
"I'm a little brat who won't shut the hell up! And stop talking!"
What did the human say to the fly when it was buzzing around the human's head?
"Would you stop bugging me!"