Still jokes

Your arms are open. They stretch towards me, Reaching, grabbing, pulling me, Surrounding me, Drowning me in my helplessness. Time standing still, inside here. Looking through windows, time passing by. Let me go, will ya?

Yo mama's so fat, when she went on the scale it said, "Still counting."

Your momma's so fat, when she pulls her knickers down, her ass is still in 'em!

It's important to have a good vocabulary. If I had known the difference between "antidote" and "anecdote," one of my best friends would still be alive.

My parents created a joke 11 years ago and people are still laughing at it, but I know it's not me because jokes have meaning.

What type of people have the world record for most stories read in the shortest amount of time?

Emos, some of them are still in the air.

What animal jumps the highest?

An emo kid, some of them are still up there.

TJ's hairline so far back you still couldn't find it when the Devil was alive.

I was crying at school because my grandpa died. My friends asked what his last words were. I told them his last words were, "Are you still holding the ladder?"

I'm shidding. Still babies are still coming and going.

My friend died. Me and my other bestie start singing the coffin song. My bestie in the coffin, why are you not sad? Why are you still alive?

Less depresso, more espresso, I'm still depressed, but now I'm fast.

Queen Elizabeth died a couple weeks ago. I'm still trying to find the reboot catd.

Yo mom's so fat, I went over to her house a few years ago and wanted to watch TV.

So I asked for the TV remote, and she's still trying to get it!

Anne Frank is still the Nazi hide-and-go-seek champion.

What's worse than 100 dead babies in a skip?

The one that's still alive in the middle trying to eat its way out.

It’s Christmas and Sally has a gift. She got a Barrie. Just kidding, she still hasn’t opened it.

If a vegan and a vegan have a fight, is it still considered beef?

Friend (Evan): Did you do some dumb shit?

Me: Hell yeah.

Friend (Evan): Did you get us both in trouble?

Me: Hell yeah.

Friend (Evan): Will I still help you because you are my best friend?

Both: FUCK YEAH!

"Prince, be honest, do you still love me?"