Still jokes

Baby

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

More than 9 because my basement is still dark.

Sandal

I'm still wondering who took Jesus' sandals.

Even the one who ate that dove that sat at Jesus' shoulder. 🤔

Song

Stephen Hawking's least favorite song is "I'm Still Standing."

Memes

String

You look at it. You tug on it like a shoe string. You play with it like elastic bubble plastic, but it still never grows.

Emo

What's the difference between emos and 9/11?

The emos are still there, high up off the ground.

Relationship

I got the new phone with longer lasting battery, but it still lasts longer than your relationships, ooooooooooo!

Wife

My wife is so fat. After sex, I rolled over twice. I was still on top of the bitch!

Mom

I asked my mom with cerebral palsy a question.

Still waiting on an answer.

Earthquake

There was once a small earthquake, but when I got outside, I realized my brother was still stuck inside. When I told my mom, she just said, "It doesn't matter, you're my favorite anyway!"

Magic

Q: What do you say when Trump is still president during 2020? A: Magic!

Basement

One day I told a kid what 2 x 12 was. He said he didn't know. I said let's go to my basement and figure it out. He is still in my basement trying to do the equation.

Tail

Uranus caught a 3-meter flatty while surfing. Check the tail still kicking. Deadly, my bruz!

Sleep

What are you doing, son? It has been an hour, and you are still in front of the mirror closing your eyes.

Mum, actually I want to see how I look while sleeping...

Yo mama

Picture of yo mama last Christmas and the damn thing’s still printing.

Viagra

They say if Viagra lasts more than four hours, call the doctor? I’m just wondering, it’s been six hours and I’m still hard, should I call the doctor or hop on another woman?