Why do women have cleaner minds than men? Because they change theirs more often.
What is a kidnapper's favorite shoe?
White Vans.
What’s the German word for BRA? Keep two from floppin'.
What are kidnappers' favorite shoes? White vans.
What's the difference between a white and a black fairytale? White begins with, "Once upon a time..." Black begins with, "Y'all motherf...s ain't gonna believe this sh.."
Why don't Chinese kids celebrate Christmas?
Because they make the toys.
Why doesn't Mexico compete in the Olympics?
Because all the Mexicans who can run, jump, and swim are in the U.S.
How do you execute a retard?
The Electric Wheelchair.
There was a plane crash. The pilot's names were Captain Sum Ting Wong, Wi Tu Lo, Ho Lee Fuk, and Bang Ding Ow.
What's an Emo's favorite drink?
Water, JK it's cyanide.
I was about to say an African joke, but it was too dry.
Why did the blondie put her iPad in the blender? To make apple juice.
Why are Asian's eyes always squinted?
Nukes are bright.
If a heterosexual man wanted his dick sucked, what would a feminist say to him that a gay man would never say to him?
"Not now, I have a headache."
What do you call a fat, ugly, and hairy woman with a rape whistle? A feminist.
I'm not racist, my best friends are black for Halloween. :)
Three blonde sisters die and are told by an angel that in order for them to go to heaven they have to pass all 100 steps. But each step has a joke, each joke gets funnier and funnier. And in order to pass them all, you can't laugh at any joke or else you go to hell. The blonde girls accept the offer.
So the angel begins telling them the jokes. One of the girls laughs at the 3rd step. The second blonde laughs halfway there. Finally, the last blonde was at the 100th step. The angel said, "This is the last step. If you laugh you will go straight to hell with your sisters and if you don't you can pass." The blonde agrees and the angel starts to tell the joke, "What do you ca..." Out of nowhere the blonde starts bursting out laughing. "Why are you laughing? I haven't even finished the joke yet!" The blonde replies, "I just got the first joke!"
What is the worst thing about breaking up with a Japanese girl?
You need to drop the bomb twice on her before she gets it.
Spongebob is yellow, and he can't drive.
Must be Asian.
Why can't Helen Keller drive?
Because she's a woman.
