Fairytale jokes
What's the difference between a Christian and a child who believes Santa exists?
Nothing. They both believe in fairytales!
What's the difference between a white and a black fairytale? White begins with, "Once upon a time..." Black begins with, "Y'all motherf...s ain't gonna believe this sh.."
What's the difference between a Christian and a child who believes Santa exists?
Nothing. They both believe in fairytales!
When will delusional Christians grow up and realize their fairy tales aren't based in reality?
My ex-wife was smoking pot with Snow White, when the 7 dwarfs saw them they sang...
"Look at those high Ho's! Hiiiiiiii Hoooooo'sssss!!!!"
My girlfriend wanted a marriage just like a fairy tale. Fair enough. I gave her a loaf of bread and left her in the forest with a rabid wolf.
What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball?
Gock gock gock ghghghkghlhglhglhk.
This dwarf was being mean to me, so I said, "When you get home, I hope Snow White kicks the shit out of you."
Motherhood is a fairytale in reverse. You start in a beautiful gown and end up cleaning everyone's messes.
One person said you are much more beautiful than Cinderella. The next day, you're in court and Cinderella is the witness.
(P.S. she was born to be a drama queen.)
Snow White and the six Dwarfs, Sneezy was caught by covid-19 quarantine!
What do you call an ugly, grey thing?
Cinderelephant!
Bro, you can't talk; you look like the dwarf from Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.
Little Timmy is hanging out with Rapunzel, and he mentions Hugo and a few other characters from Varian And The Seven Kingdoms, and she responds with, “Who the frick are you talking about? Since I don’t know them, I got a surprise for you!” She wraps him up in Christmas wrapping paper labeled "For Eugene."
"The legend says Tinker Bell was good in jerkin' off Peter with her tiny fingers, but it pains me to think that Captain Hook was a closeted-sadist boyfriend."
Three boys are playing on a slide when a genie appeared.
The genie says, "Whatever you shout when you go down the slide, I will grant you a bucket full of."
The first boy goes down the slide shouting, "diamonds!", and he gets a bucket of diamonds.
The second boy goes down the slide and shouts, "gold!", and gets a bucket of gold.
The third boy, who never listens or pays attention, goes down the slide and shouts "weeeeeeee!"
Why was Cinderella banned from playing sports? Because she always ran away from the ball.
A young man was crossing the road when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I will turn into a beautiful princess." The man took the frog, smiled at it, and put it in his wallet.
The frog called out again, "If you kiss me and I turn into a princess, I will live with you for a week and do everything you want." The young man took the frog out, smiled, and put it back.
Then the frog called out, "Okay, okay! I will be with you and do whatever you want forever!" The young man laughed and put it back in his wallet.
Finally, the frog asked, "What is wrong with you? I'm offering to be a beautiful princess! Why won't you kiss me?"
The young man said, "Listen, I'm an engineer. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog is pretty cool."
You know how in Pinocchio the French puppets have the thigh rings?
Well, I got them too! Only red and thinner.