Start Jokes

Your hairline starts at the back of your head.

When you’re in india and you start hearing a tick tick tick tick you run

One day Billy, Bob, and Doo Da went fishing in a small boat. None of them could swim and they had no life jackets. Doo Da suddenly started yelling, " I got one boys! '' as he started trying to reel the fish in. It was way to large for him to get onto the boat and he fell into the water. The fish had a nice meal that night. Billy and Bob were in shock, but knew they had to tell Mrs. Doo Da. Upon arriving at her house, they did rock paper scissors on who had to tell her the news. Bob lost. He slowly rang the doorbell and Mrs. Doo Da answered. "U-uhm.. we...Doo D-Da..f-fish..." Bob stuttered then he screamed and ran off. Billy went to go retrieve his friend. Billy had a nice little talk with him and slapped him across the face to get him to just say what happened. Soon, the two men returned to Mrs. Doo Da's house and rang the doorbell, again. She opened the door and looked at the two men and asked, " I've been trying to call Doo Da and he hasn't answered, is he ok?" Bob took a deep breath and took a step forward with a smile on his face. He sang, " We went fishing, guess who died, Doo Da, Doo Da. He smiled and he said good bye, we morn Doo Da today.''

what do you call a bunch of people near each other

the start of the hollacoast

A guy start texting a Cute girl and ask to give her phone no. So he can't call her the girl ok but you have to transfer mobile balance to my number then I am gonna be your gf and will meet you somewhere the transfer her the balance and called her but turn out the girl was actually a guy making him fool he blocked him. Next day he was very angry about himself being fool so thought he gonna do the same he make a fake girl account and start texting with some random guy and then he ask that guy to send him balance. Suddenly his father came in his bedroom and ask " son can you send me some balance i am gonna send you can after sometime" that guy look at his father with suspicious eyes and then he call that random number suddenly his father phone start ringing......

I went to the bathroom and into a stall, to see a hole in the wall. I reminded me of 'The Lickable Wallpaper' from 'Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory'. I jokingly started licking. Though, the carrot tasted musky, and kinda wrinkly.

This man walks into a bar and says... "how do i get service here." The assistant bar attendent tells him him to take a seat as the bar tender will be there to serve him shortly. After 2 minutes the man says this is ridiculous that he has to wait. The assistant then offers him a bar snack of free nuts which the man duly eats. Another 2 minutes goes buy and the man then says ok i get it no service of beer but free nuts to which the assistant says hell no the game starts in 10 minutes. Everyone laughs and claps.

The man walks into a bar reaches into his pocket and pulls out a tiny piano and a tiny piano player the piano player starts playing the piano, the guy next to him asks where did you get that, the man says there is a genie out on the corner granting wishes, so the man sitting next to him jumps up and runs outside he says to the genie I want a million bucks, the genie snaps his fingers and a million ducks appear in the road, the man comes back inside and says hey that genie is a little hard of hearing, the man says well did you really think I'd ask for a 12-in pianist

Mr. Smith: Neona, tell us what you have for the biggest competition that we can do to keep our competitors out of the winning streak.

Neona: Will thought we used more sales and more advertising.

Mr. Smith: It's already a good idea. Now what about the business plan? We need it as recommendations to keep the business going. Tell me, what do you have in mine?

Neona: It is better to always have a plan. I was thinking that we can get higher prices and always get great deals, the people will go nuts for a great deal!

Mr. Smith: Perfect. Now let's take a 5 minute break.

Mr. Smith: Ok, 5 minutes is up!

Now Neona, I know you are an intern, but what are the best things we can do for the company?

Neona: Hmm...lets see...will we can start with all the things people love! If this is going to work then we have have to......

So my brother said we should start a band and I said I already had a band...so I gave him my band and said he was talking about music and I said well I do have a trum-bone ;)

Me and my mom order Chinese food. My mom grab the egg roll, and start licking it up and down, and sucking on it in from of the Chinese delivery. I said why are you doing that for. Then my mom I love him a long time so we don't have to pay for the food.

Gwen (😐): Addison, I don't mean to be mean but ur rlly starting tb an asshole!

Addison (😞): I don't know what u mean. I've always been an asshole. That is why people pound me in the asshole!

Kariah (🖕🏼) : that sad!

i suck on cups so START RUNNIN CUPHEAD

I once went up to a orphan and they were crying and I asked where there parents are and they started crying more

How to tell your kid is adopted? Hi daisy lets play a game called your adopted i will start your mum died so i had to adopt you but dont think i live you beacuse ypur where the only kid their haha

So one day i walk up to my sister and tell her that she is adopted because she doesn't look like anyone in the famloy she starts to cry my mom ask why shes crying and i say i told her she was adopted and i was tgere for the adopten and we have peppers it was all a lie she is not adopted and every thing is fine