Sport jokes
Yo mama so stupid, she went to the Super Bowl with a spoon!
What do you call the 10th hole on a military golf course?
Ten-putt!
I asked my mum to be in the Paralympics, and she said I had to eat more vegetables.
P = Person (not original "pun")
P1: Hey girl! P2: I got a bf! P1: Well, I got a Lamborghini Aventador, a Bugatti Super Sports, a yacht, and a private plane. P2: BF stand for breakfast. P2: Oh, and also, where did you get all that stuff? P1: GTA5 P2: You motherfucker!!!
(Communications with this person are now blocked)
"Sweet victory" fans: Fuck the NFL. They should be disbanded!
Harvey Weinstein: I raped five girls, and the NFL was one of them.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because he can't find his parents.
You are so small that you play hockey against the curb!
Q: Why did the two gate-builders start fighting?
A: Because they were fencing.
What's a lesbian's favorite sport? Dodgeball.
Why do basketball players love cookies so much?
Because they can dunk them!
I wondered why the baseball was getting closer...
Then it hit me!
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can’t find home.
What has 3 legs, 4 arms, and 5 heads?
The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
What’s the difference between a penis and a golf ball?
A penis always goes in the hole.
What did a jockey's manager say to him before the race?
"Use the horse!"
There is a ghost baseball game and one team loses because of one player so they start booing him!
What did the baseball player say to the bassist?
Nice baseline!
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger.
Then it hit me.
What is similar between sex and fishing?
It doesn't matter how deep you go, it matters how you wiggle the worm.
A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and was pulled over by a woman police officer, who was also a blonde.
The blonde cop asked to see the blonde driver's license. She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated.
'What does it look like?' she finally asked. The policewoman replied, 'It's square and it has you picture on it.'
The driver finally found a square mirror in her purse, looked at it and handed it to the policewoman. 'Here it is,' she said.
The blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying, "OK, you can go. I didn't realize you were a cop..."