Sport jokes
What has 3 legs, 4 arms, and 5 heads?
The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
What’s the difference between a penis and a golf ball?
A penis always goes in the hole.
What did a jockey's manager say to him before the race?
"Use the horse!"
There is a ghost baseball game and one team loses because of one player so they start booing him!
What did the baseball player say to the bassist?
Nice baseline!
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger.
Then it hit me.
What is similar between sex and fishing?
It doesn't matter how deep you go, it matters how you wiggle the worm.
A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and was pulled over by a woman police officer, who was also a blonde.
The blonde cop asked to see the blonde driver's license. She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated.
'What does it look like?' she finally asked. The policewoman replied, 'It's square and it has you picture on it.'
The driver finally found a square mirror in her purse, looked at it and handed it to the policewoman. 'Here it is,' she said.
The blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying, "OK, you can go. I didn't realize you were a cop..."
What is Michael Jordan's favorite coffee place? Dunkin' Donuts.
Me and my friend were hunting ducks. He had a 12 gauge shotgun, and he looked over and I had a .50 caliber machine gun. He said, "You're crazy!" I responded, "Quackers."
What is a cow's favorite water sport?
Ca-MOO-ing!
I tried making an orphan baseball team. It sucked because they couldn’t find home plate.
What do you call a girl with no legs? Sarah.
What do you call an Olympic gold medalist skiing? Not Sarah.
You don’t need a parachute to go skydiving, you need a parachute to go skydiving twice.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because it's not original at all.
In America, there was a boy named Urhan, and he had one hand and a stump, and a girl named Handa who was an orphan. They had a trial for the Boston Red Sox, and they failed because Urhan couldn’t stump the ball, and Handa didn’t know where home was.
Why is an orphan so bad at baseball?
Because they can't make it to home.
Why don't orphans play baseball?
Because they don't know where home is.
I wonder why the baseball was getting larger and larger, then it hit me.
Why can't an orphan go on away games?
Their parent will never show up!