Someone jokes

What do a bullet and a police officer have in common?

When a bullet kills someone, it gets fired.

An orphan goes up to someone. The guy says, "Where are your parents?"

The orphan says, "Why do you think I'm wearing ripped pyjamas?"

when someone says to cheer up: you, I never thought of that. :)

-> in reality, :( (sob)

depression is no game, and here in this world, we are here for each other, although at times it might not seem like it.

Keep strong, and you'll find the end of the tunnel, but ending the pain and being gone just spreads depression.

When someone keeps talking while you are trying to focus on something, what is the rudest thing you can say to them?

SHUT UP!!!

When someone tells me to kill myself,

Panic! At The Disco: Don't Threaten Me With A Good Time.

So I was asleep and woke up and went to work. My wife left already to her job. I was driving my car and ran over someone. I woke up in my bed, realized it was all a dream.

20 minutes later I got a phone call that my wife got hit by a car.

Making fun of someone you're angry with is childish. Be an adult and hit them with your car <3

Get a head in life by decapitating someone.

There is someone in my class named Henry Rocket Rueben, and he always says he rockets into my mom.

Me: 911, I just killed someone.

Cops: Cool, we will not come.

Me: Why?

Cops: Don't admit a crime.

Phones: *Bang Bang*

Me: Well, that was 2 crimes done.

I said to Google, "How do I kill someone?" Then I got https://www.wired.com/story/dark-web-bitcoin-murder-cottage-grove in the front. Before you click it, it says, "If you want to kill someone, we are the right guys." How the f*** did this get in Google?

When someone says "Did I ask?" say "Then why did you respond?"

What do you call someone who is extra virgin?

Mrs. Frame.

The Britains walk in the house of the alcoholic grandad. They ask Mary, the mum, why she had blood all over her, and she said someone dropped the butter. They walked into the living room, and Thomas was dead on the floor.

My brother got his legs chopped off, but someone FBI opened my basement door, but it wasn't my brother because he died of starvation in the basement.

Someone asks a question: Who? Who asked? Boom, you"re done xxx.

If I could make someone tell me their last words, they'd say, "Make me."

I saw my friend hang themselves. My response was, I guess they wanted to hang with someone.

When someone says you're an orphan, say, "At least I was wanted, unlike you!"

How do you try to shout at someone on the bottom of the ground?

"Hey, sir! Are you dead?"