Solution jokes
Q. Why do orphans love elevators?
A. Because they're the only things to raise them.
Q: How do you know if an Asian broke into your house?
A: All your homework and the Rubik's cube you spent a year on and still can鈥檛 solve is solved. 馃馃馃馃
How do I fix a broken light bulb? I don't. I simply blow up the house.
Too many people.
Not enough VooDoo dolls.
How do you get rid of a fat ghost? You exercise it.
Today I went to the doctor for a test, and he said I have 10 months to live.
So later that day I stabbed him to death, and the judge sentenced me for 15 years in prison. Problem solved!
I've realized that suicide would solve all my problems... if I could just get the right people to try it.
Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day; set a man on fire, and he'll be warm the rest of his life.
"That driving backwards, it creeping me out, you're gonna wreck or something." - Lightning McQueen.
Because that is what could have saved Titanic, and it wrecked.
How do you stop a baby from crawling? Nail its hand to the floor.
I went to a book store yesterday and I saw a book that said "how to solve 50% of your problems." So I bought 2.
What do you do if your dick is smoking?
Get your mum to lick it.
I heard that to slow the growth of fire, you use a flame retardant.
So I threw my stupid son in the flames when my house caught on fire!
Cars are like bullets; you jump in front of one, and they solve all your problems.
How do you get a depressed kid out of a tree? You cut the rope.
If you are homeless, get a home.
Listen, my brothers, if you see a photo of her with another person,
Just go to her house and shoot her with your AK47.
How are humans and computers different? A human doesn't have trouble shooting.
I didn鈥檛 know how to fasten my seatbelt. Then it clicked.
Do you wanna lose ten pounds of ugly fat? Cut off your head.