Society jokes
Why don't orphans go to Family Dollar? They don't have a family to go with 'em.
I made a website for orphans.
Unfortunately, it doesn't have a home page.
Hippity hoppity, you are no one's property.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
They don’t know where home is.
One time I tried running to home, but I forgot I don't have one, so I stayed at third.
Every kid in a classroom is relevant, because if one of them gets shot, they will all be featured on the news.
And Mary said God had given her a child, so Joseph went and joined Fathers For Justice.
An orphanage is like a horse rescue: you rescue them, you rehabilitate them, and then you sell them to the highest bidder.
What does an orphan call a family picture?
Answer: a selfie.
When the school shooter enters the classroom and it's the quiet kid's dad.
Why do depressed people want to kill themselves?
To be loved on the news show for 10 minutes.
What did the orphan say to his stepmom?
"I need help."
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
9/11 victims: they went through a hundred stories in 10 seconds.
Did you hear about the guy that went to a nudist colony? The first day was his hardest.
Why did the orphan go to church?
So that they had someone to call father.
When you donate a kidney, you are a total hero, everyone loves you.
When you donate five kidneys though, people start yelling, the police gets called--sheesh!
For every orphan, a bag of chips is family size.
Alcoholics don't run in my family, they drive.
I saw two blind men fighting at the mall. I yelled, "He has a gun!" They both ran.
A guy is talking to an Indian therapist.
He had a red dot, and the American thought it was from a sniper rifle and tackled him and said, "I thought the red dot on your head was from a sniper rifle!"