Society jokes
Q. What type of flour do orphans get?
A. Self-raising flour.
I think it’s dumb that people say a woman belongs in the kitchen.
How else is the rest of the house going to get cleaned?
Why don't Indians like snow?
Because it's white all over their land.
You know what I hate about rape?
Keeping it a secret.
A slag is like the first piece of bread in a loaf. Everyone touches it, but nobody wants it.
Memes
A blind guy shot up a town.
I guess he couldn’t see the road to heaven.
China has a population of a billion people. One billion.
That means even if you’re a one in a million kind of guy, there are still a thousand others exactly like you.
Johnny is walking along, and a priest is coming the other way. Johnny says, "Hey, mister, why are you wearing your collar backwards?"
The priest says, "Because I'm a father."
Johnny says, "Yeah? Well, my old man's got three kids, and he don't wear his collar backwards."
The priest says, "You don't understand, son. I have thousands of children."
Johnny says, "You should wear your fuckin' trousers backwards."
What do you call a short black person?
By their name, you racist!
When the school shooter asks the autistic kid which hostage he wants to rape, and he looks at you like 😋.
What's the best part of being a pedophile? You will never have a wife.
What do you call a Mexican in the zombie apocalypse?
Answer: "Sweet and spicy chicken."
What do a priest and a McDonalds have in common?
They both slide their meat in 10 year old buns.
Why is it ok to smack an orphan?
What are they going to do? Tell their parents!
The blind person can’t eat fish, it’s “sea food”.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
What can you give a white person that you can't give to a black person?
A black eye.
What do Ellen DeGeneres and homeless people have in common?
They don’t cook because they love eating out.
Most people smother babies with love.
I smother them with pillows.
What's an orphan's favorite game?
GTA, because they're actually wanted? Lol.