Size jokes
Do you know what is good about being an orphan?
Every candy bar is family sized.
Yo mama is so fat, a picture of her would fall off the wall.
Your forehead is so big that you can see the whole world before you do!
Your forehead is so big it makes Megamind's head look small.
Old woman: You are such a darling child. Please come and see me again next year.
A year later, as child walks up to the door of the old lady's house...
Old woman: Oh my! Goodness sakes, child! Have you grown, or have I shrank???
Child: Both.
Memes
Obesity kills thousands of times more Americans than shooting does, which teaches us an important lesson:
Shooters do poorly given the size of their targets.
Yo mama's so fat, when she sits around the house, she SITS AROUND the house.
Yo mama so fat that when God said, "Let there be light," he asked her to move out the way.
Chuck Norris' dick is so big that it has its own dick. And his dick's dick is still bigger than Bruce Lee.
Yo mama so fat, when she went on the weighing scale, it said, "To be continued."
Joe mama so fat when she got sturdy, she tripped on her shoelaces, fell on her face, and fell down 2 floors.
Yo mama so fat, she eats with three utensils: a knife, spoon, and a forklift.
Your forehead is so big, you could roast meat on it.
Your forehead is so big that the teachers use it as a whiteboard.
Short girl: "How do you see up there?"
Tall guy: "Who said that?"
I spit my drink out and then ran away.
Big Mom is so fat, Trafalgar Law canβt make enough room for her!
Yo mama so fat that she doesn't need the internet, she is worldwide.
Yo mama is so fat that when she was at school, they needed a satellite to take her school photo.
Your forehead's so big that you dream in 4k.
Yo mama so fat, she crosses every border.