Why did the ground crack? Because of your mum!
What is tall when it's young but short when it's old?
A candle or a pencil!
Do you ever wonder why orphans buy small cereal boxes? It's because they can't get family size.
Ur momma's so fat that when she became a spy her codename was OObese.
Your PP is small, just like my will to live.
Yo mama so fat, she is one of the boulders in Indiana Jones.
I have big balls, said the kid holding two soccer balls.
A female class teacher was having a problem with a boy in her class in Grade 3.
The boy said, "Madam, I should be in Grade 4. I am smarter than my sister & she's in Grade 4".
The Madam had heard enough and took the boy to the principal. The principal decided to test the boy with some questions from Grade 4.
*Principal:* What is 3+3?
*Boy:* 6.
*Principal:* 6+6.
*Boy:* 12.
The boy got all the questions right. The principal told the Madam to send the boy to Grade 4 immediately. The Madam decided to ask her own questions and the principal agreed.
*Madam:* What does a cow have 4 of that I have only 2?
*Boy:* Legs.
*Madam:* What is in your trousers that I don't have?
*Boy:* Pockets.
*Madam:* What starts with a C and ends with T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin, whitish liquid?
*Boy:* Coconut.
*Madam:* What goes in hard & then comes out soft & sticky?
The principal's eyes opened really wide, but before he could stop the answer, the boy was taking charge
*Boy:* Bubble gum.
*Madam:* You stick your pole inside me. You tie me down to get me up, I get wet before you do.
*Boy:* Tent.
*The principal was looking restless*
*Madam:* A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you are bored. The best man always has me first?.
*Boy:* Wedding ring.
*Madam:* I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I Drip. When you blow me, you feel good?
*Boy:* Nose.
*Madam:* I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates, I come with a quiver.
*Boy:* Arrow.
*Principal:* O MY GOD.
*Madam:* What starts with 'F' and ends wit a 'K' and if you don't get it, you've to use your hand?
*Boy:* Fork.
*Madam:* What is it that all men have, it's longer in some men than others, the Pope doesn't use his and a man gives it to his wife after marriage?
*Boy:* Surname.
*Principal:* Ohooo !
*Madam:* What part of the man has no bone but has muscles with a lot of veins like pumpkin and is responsible for making love?
*Boy:* Heart.
*Principal:* Eeeeeh! The principal breathed a sigh of relief and said to the Madam, "Send this bloody boy to the university. I myself got all the answers wrong!"
Your forehead built like Darkseid from DC.
Imagine me being 12 feet taller than your dad.
Yo mama so fat, she plays tennis with Pluto.
Yo mama so fat, she uses a mattress as a diaper.
What do you call a dwarf suicide bomber?
A party popper.
Yo mama so fat, she is 4 feet tall laying down.
Your mama is so fat, she broke the stairs to Heaven.
Yo momma's so fat that she plays pool with planets.
Yo mama so fat, a bus ran into her and she said, "WHO THREW THAT TWINKIE AT ME?!"
If I went out with a dwarf, when I pick them up, I'll say, "Wassup short?"
Yo mama's feet are so fat, she had to wear a sock on each toe.
Your momma so fat when she jumped the world collapsed.
