Situation jokes
When the grass is bloody, You play in the mud...
Paddy and Murphy are walking down the street when all of a sudden, Paddy falls down a manhole. Murphy shouts down, "Paddy, is it dark down there?"
Paddy shouts up, "Dunno Murphy, I crnt see a fecking thing!"
I am an orphan...
Me: I need a good roast.
My friend: Take me!
Why do orphans not like Family Guy? Because they have family.
They're not jokes, they're notes now, get me?
I am in trouble.
When you ask an orphan to come over:
Kid: "Do you want to come over to my house?"
Orphan: "Yeah, sure."
Kid: "Ok, ask your parents—oh wait."
What happens when there's ten people in one house and they all have to shit and there's one bathroom?
It's a motherfucking shitshow party!
Why couldn't the orphan have the bag of chips?
It was family size.
You know what's the most awkward situation in the world? A rapper with erectile dysfunction.
Why is the orphan sad for dinner?
He has no one to eat with at the table.
Why did the cop ask the orphan if he was home alone?
The orphan said because my parents have never come back yet because I have none.
What did the lady say when she sat on Pinocchio's face:
"Tell a truth, tell a lie, tell a truth, tell a lie, tell a truth!"
I saw a girl crying. I told her, "Where are your parents?" She cried more after that. I got kicked out of the orphanage.
I walk into a bar. There was a line of people waiting to punch me. Yup. That was the punch line.
Orphan: Can I go outside?
Coworker at orphanage: Go ask your mom.
Orphan: WAWAWAWAWAW
How did the orphan become famous?
By "go[ing] big or go[ing] home."
Once, my father came home and found me in front of a roaring fire.
That made my father very mad, as we didn’t have a fireplace.
Why do orphans hate dad jokes? They never return.
I came on for an orphan joke.
Then I realized they are a joke.