Bunger got me like:
đ Face with Tears of Joy Emoji - Emojipedia https://emojipedia.org âș face-with-tears-of-joy A yellow face with a big grin, uplifted eyebrows, and smiling eyes, each shedding a tear from laughing so hard. Widely used to show something is funny or...
"Balls" got me like: đ
Orphans got me like: đ
jokes got me like : đ Face with Tears of Joy Emoji - Emojipedia https://emojipedia.org âș face-with-tears-of-joy A yellow face with a big grin, uplifted eyebrows, and smiling eyes, each shedding a tear from laughing so hard. Widely used to show something is funny or...
Tazzaro got me like: đ
Did you hear about the magician who did magic with chocolate?
I heard he had loads of Twix up his sleeve.
Sex is like show and tell: you show your pussy and dick, and then you tell each other how you feel.
Why don't orphans watch TV?
Because of "Family Guy."
So little Susie came home and said, "Mom, little Johnny showed me his pecker."
And her mom said, "WHAT?!"
And little Susie was like, "Yeah, it reminded me of a peanut." Her mom said, "Oh, because it was so small?"
Susie said, "No, because it tasted salty."
Q: Why do we tell actors to break a leg?
A: Because all shows and movies have a cast.
The reason why God and Jesus have eternal life and the power, aka (holy spirit) is to control us, take our free will, and our eternal life, which is our heaven. Our time!
Just to show up, in the nick of time for the second coming in full costume ready to judge us. Them spending a lifetime preparing their big speech, their excuse of them hiding this whole time.
Lol, Surprise!
Joke being on them.
As we all stand there and are there to judge them, doing what they said they were made for.
Taking our eternal life back from Satan and the Devil and sending them to their home they created themselves!
HELL!
P.S. With a little extra punishments!
An old man gets a call from the IRS.
The man on the phone says, âWeâve noticed large sums of money coming in and going out of your account constantly, and we gotta get this straight. Come in tomorrow and weâll have a chat about this.â The old man thinks for a while and then decides he better get his lawyer to come with him.
The next day the old man and his lawyer show up to the IRS office, and the man there says, âSo weâve noticed these large sums of money entering and leaving your account nonstop. Can you explain this?â The man replies, âWell, I will bet on pretty much anything. Like this! I bet you 10,000 I can bite my own eye.â The agent takes the bet, and the man takes out his glass eye and bites it. He then says, âWait. Iâll give you a chance to earn your money back, and more! I bet you 20,000 I can bite my other eye.â The agent thinks a minute and realizing the man isnât blind, takes the bet. The old man takes out his false teeth and bites his other eye. He then says, âAlright, last chance. I bet you 50,000 I can stand on this side of your office and pee into that wastebasket on the opposite side without getting a drop anywhere in between.â The agent thinks real hard but decides itâs impossible, so takes the bet. The man unzips his pants and pees all over the IRS agentâs desk. The agent jumps up and down and says, âHaha! I got you now!â But the man's lawyer goes pale in the face, sinks his head in his hands, and says, âHe bet me 100,000 on the way over here that he could piss all over your desk and youâd just love it!â
Say this when showing this website to someone: "You know, it's too bad this website doesn't have a homepage."
So, I was at a stand up comedy show in Russia where the comedian was making fun of Putin. The jokes werenât that good, but I loved the execution.
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what itâs like to be wanted.
Why are orphans bad at poker? They donât know what a full house is.
I saw a child crying yesterday, so I asked him where his parents were. Bad move. I got fired from my job at the orphanage.
What do you call an orphanâs family reunion? Me time.
Did you know? The letter âfâ in orphan stands for family.
What is an orphanâs least favorite song? We Are Family.
Whatâs an orphanâs least favorite TV show? Family Guy.
Whatâs an orphanâs least favorite movie? Meet the Parents.
Whatâs an orphanâs least favorite type of music? House.
Whatâs an orphanâs least favorite store? Home Depot.
Whatâs an orphanâs favorite band? Foster the People.
What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.
Where do orphan chickens end up? Foster Farms.
What beer do orphans drink? Fosterâs.
Why do orphans have water with their cereal? Because their dad never came back with the milk.
What do you call a fish with no parents? An orfin.
Why do orphans like playing tennis? Because itâs the only love they get.
Me: Are you an orphan? Orphan: Yes, what gave me away? Me: Your parents.
Why do shows have a family? Because they are "Pair-rents"!
Jimmy Savile should have presented Pop off the Tops instead of Top of the Pops.
Pokemon: Whatâs Wailmerâs favorite TV show?
Whale of Fortune.
Me: How does this thing work?
ForTnite kid: Oh, you donât know how to use a pistol? Look, Iâll show you.
ForTnitekid: *shoots foot*
Me: That wasnât a very good demonstration.
I was in an audition for the lead role of movie "Aquaman." The Director told me to dive into a pool. Then outta nowhere Penaldo showed up and made a big dive into the pool. The director was impressed and selected Penaldo for the movie.
Shame on you Penaldo for destroying my dream!
