So, Little Johnny's teacher is warned at the beginning of the school year not to ever make a bet with Johnny unless she is absolutely sure she will win it. One day in class, Johnny raises his hand and says, "Teacher, I'll bet you $50 I can guess what color your underwear is." She replies, "Okay, meet me after class and we'll settle it." But before class ends, she goes to the restroom and removes her panties. After class is over and the students clear out, Johnny makes his guess. "Blue." "Nope. You got it wrong," she says as she lifts her skirt to reveal she isn't wearing any underwear. "Well, come with me out to my dad's car, he's waiting for me, and I'll get you the money." She follows him out. When they get to the car, she informs his dad that he got the bet wrong and that she showed Johnny that she wasn't wearing any underwear. His dad exclaims: "That mother fucker! He bet me $100 this morning that he'd see your pussy before the end of the day!"
When you step on the weighing scale, it shows your phone number!
I was on the Official Cristiano Ronaldo website when suddenly my Anti-Virus software showed an alert on my screen! The notification read "WARNING: FRAUD DETECTED!" I was shocked but not surprised.
Penaldo has been finished for years after all, and he often ghosts in big games.
A girl did squats everyday with a 20 pound weight in her hand to finally text her boyfriend, "Show me your dick now!"
I asked my friend if they will show me something retarded. He said, "Go look in a mirror." I said, "Thank you."
What is a orphans least favorite show: “how I met your mother”
When the ugliest cat looked at you, then you search up the ugliest thing in the world, you show up.
I talk about the girls in my math class simping over anime characters and making random ships as well as for Miraculous Ladybug children's show, whatever the show is called, but it's a kids show. 💀 Now they’re searching up pictures of Tom Holland laughing in their absolute weirdness.
I like Tom Holland, but these kids man, they like him like they’re in a relationship. They might as well start kissing and licking the screen. They’re probably writing fanfictions in their free time when they aren’t searching up kids show characters, anime characters, and Tom Holland pics on their SCHOOL CHROMEBOOK. Their only device choice was a school-provided laptop which is monitored by the school while they are writing fan fictions on Google Docs and searching up some weird Tom Holland stuff. Imagine how Tom Holland would feel if he found out that there are 11 year old girls searching up some weird stuff about him.
You heard that Michael Jackson autopsy reports showed he died of food poisoning?
It’s because he ate some 8 year old nuts.
Bo: Hey kids, I am so sad that you won’t exercise and give me Bo power, so I am just going to be an orphan.
Kids changing the channel to Annie.
Annie: Tomorrow, tomorrow, only a day away.
TV changing the channel back to Bo On The Go.
Dezzy: WAAAAAAAAAA, I can’t find Bo!
What's an emo's least favorite show?
Dr. Phil.
Boy: "Why can't you get a family?"
Me: "Why can't you get a rope?"
Boy: "What do you mean?"
Friend and me: "We can show you."
Me: "I will tie the rope."
Friend: "I will push the chair."
I was digging in a garden once and found a chest full of gold. I wanted to show my wife, but then I thought about why I was digging in the first place.
What show can the orphan relate to...Full house
My wife said she wanted to leave me. She said it’s because of the abuse, but really, she’s the one abusing herself by drinking alcohol and got poisoning the next day. This shows almost half of the woman’s population is weak both physically and mentally.
This is bullshit! Stop showing cheesy and dumb jokes! This website is for dark humor, insults, and morbid content! All of you who don’t talk about the following, go die!
So last night I went on a taxi and I showed them your photo. All they said was I could ride him, it would be expensive though, since from his eyebrows to hairline is at least £100.
Why did Elsa let go of the balloon?
Car show: "Let It Go," get it?
Depressed should be spelled "depraseed" because then they would be 1, 2, 5, 9.
Why did the hedgehog cross the road? To show he had guts. Why did the other hedgehog cross the road? To see his flag mate.
