Short jokes
Roses are red, violets are blue, Your ass is clean because Randy won’t stop liking [it].
What do you call a stupid pig? A pious.
What do you call a kid with 15 nukes and a shotgun?
The final countdown.
Me: I'm afraid of random letters.
Therapist: You are?
Me: [screams]
Therapist: Oh, I see.
Me: [screaming intensifies]
What do you call a downy who can't get a girlfriend?
Down bad.
How do emos fly? They hang themselves.
Why do you not have milk with your Oreos?
Daddy never came back with the milk.
Q: What does a slice of pizza and an F grade have in common?
A: They're both cheesy.
Who am I?
How is there evidence of climate change?
The liberal snowflakes are drastically melting down!
What does the woman say to the cannibal at the fashion show?
"Who are you wearing?"
With great depression comes great antidepressants.
Why do trees always gotta leave me hanging?
It's a grave mistake to talk badly about the death.
Your forehead is so big it makes Megamind's head look small.
A guy ate your hairline because it reminded him of a McDonald's fry!
God loved you so much that He gave you one face and started clearing off a place for another.
You know if you poo on the toilet at 11:59 PM...
Then at 12:01 AM, it's just the same shit, different day...
Why do poor people eat insects?
Because they're locust!
What do you call the American healthcare plan for poor people?
Death.