What’s bad about swinging a dead baby above your head? Stopping it with the shovel
What did Hitler tell the eye doctor? “I can na-zi.”
When it comes to recycling toilet paper you really need to process the crap out of it.
A good bath is like a dead lover.
You can enjoy them, that is until they get too cold.
When a school shooter walks to the intercom and plays pumped up kicks
What did the Chinese man say to the to his wife? I'll chin you later
One day, he started crying out of nowhere. Everyone started crying with him. There was a crying pandemic going around.
What is a bald eagle's favorite chip?
Preagles!
That dam looks dam cool
What is the most musical part of a chicken 🐔?
The drumstick 🍗.
Depression is like therapy the more you see it the more you get used to it
Potato
What's white and bloody?
Two doves in a trash compactor Talk about a failed marriage
Why couldn’t the dwarf husband make his wife pregnant?
Because of his short cummings.
What's the difference between Jesus and a painting of Jesus?
A painting only takes one nail to be hanged.
So Kobe Bryant walked into a bar just kidding he's dead and his fame went spiraling out of control.
What does NASA stand for? Need Another Seven Astronauts
I’ve got a joke about Alzheimers. Um. Oh no. I can’t actually remember it.
What do you call a kid with Down syndrome trying to beat Minecraft? “ A sped runner”.
what do ants and Michael Jackson have in common. They go in kids pants
