Short jokes
What is white, black, and blue all at the same time?
Barack Obama.
What's green and smells like bacon?
Kermit's finger.
Look at a bag of black grapes. See how dark they are? That’s how I like my men.
25 at a time.
What's black and sits on the bottom of the stairs to the cellar?
Steven Hawking where the experiments went wrong.
Cunt.
What does an autistic kid and a porn video have in common? You can shoot both of them, just not in public.
Quin loves Robin. All he says is "Robin." This isn't a joke; Quin's gay.
What’s the difference between an orphan and an apple? The apple gets picked.
Yo mama so ugly a rapist wouldn't even touch her with a barge pole.
I made a website for orphans. Unfortunately, it doesn’t have a home page.
What are Russia's favorite netball positions?
Goal Shooter and Wing Attack.
A shop assistant is helping a little boy find his mum.
"What's she like?" he asked the boy.
"BIG COCKS AND VODKA!" said the boy.
The people in the Democratic Party are how I like my coffee.
Black and bitter.
When does a joke become a dad joke? When it goes to get the milk yet never comes back.
Miss you dad.
I have big balls, said the kid holding two soccer balls.
You might think these jokes are plane.
Never break someone's heart, they only have one. Break their bones instead, they have 206 of them.
What did Nicki Minaj say when she sat next to a bomb?
"Bang bang right through the roof. Bang bang all over you."
My sister keeps cursing... so I made fun of her... "fuk fuk fuk fuk fuk fuk fuk fuk", fowl language is for chickens!
What did the sea do when it saw the beach?
It waved!