Short jokes
I asked my girlfriend if she wanted to join my family tree... She dropped the rope and ran.
Why can't gay people have hairlines? Because it's not straight.
What is a paedophile's favorite thing about Halloween?
Free delivery XD
My dad always told me I should sing tenor. Ten or twelve miles away.
Why can’t orphans get in trouble?
Because there’s no one to give a phone call home to.
I did a bungee jump for charity recently. It was called "spastics on elastics."
Me: If a skinny person goes skinny dipping, then what do fat people do?
My friend: Chunky dunks.
She a hoe, she shit on herself.
Google is a woman because it doesn’t let you finish a sentence before it makes suggestions.
I had to stop using cutting jokes because they were getting too deep.
Why do dwarfs hate fast food restaurants? Cause most of them have medium and large.
What is the second hardest thing in the morning?
Getting up.
Do I do the same for dinner tomorrow morning for you?
The Twin Towers are like snowmen; they fall and crumble.
Why are cats good at video games?
Because they have nine lives!
Everyone has cracks in them, mine's just in my heart and not my ass.
When someone calls you, say this: "Hi, welcome to Dave’s Orphanage. You make them, we take them. How may I help you?"
Q) What do you call Iron Man when he can't swim?
A) Robert Drowney Jr.
What is the difference between orphans and serial killers?
Serial killers are wanted.
Orphan more like “poor”phan because nobody likes him! :)