Short jokes
What's a dying person's least favorite app? TikTok.
A cock really has a sad life. He's hairs a mess, his neighbor's an arsehole, his best friend is a cunt.
A kid asks his dad why his name is Experience. The dad says, "That's what we give our mistakes."
Do you like pudding? Pudding deez nuts in your mouth!
What do you call a Pirate Pokemon?
Arrrrrr-ceus!
What does a mother fear most?
Hearing "YOU ARE NOT THE FATHER!" for 5 different men.
Everyone likes orphans but their parents.
What do you call a basement full of SJW's?
A whine cellar.
Why do bugs hate the internet?
Because they always get caught.
Get it? Inter-net?
Confucius say, female pilot who fly upside down have crack up.
I don't like marriage. It's just like soup, as soon as you're done spooning it, it all cools off.
(demons in my head) I laugh to meet them...
The most powerful thing in the world is babies. This is because they cry and get what every they want.
Where do math teachers go on vacation? Times Square.
Roses are red, fishers are fishing,
I really hope you’ll be reported missing.
What starts with "E" and ends with "G"?
Everything.
Why don’t orphans play baseball?
Because they don’t know where home is.
I am the grand wizard, mak.
What does an apple and suicidal person have in common?
They're both hanging from a tree.
KFC doesn't mean Kentucky Fried Chicken, it means "Kill Fat Children."