Short jokes
Cannibal eats missionary, gets a taste for religion.
Have you heard about the lemming that jumped off a cliff into an ocean?
I heard it was because of pier pressure.
What is black and white and is dead?
My Chemical Romance.
If you tell a girl they're pretty, they won't believe you. If you tell them they're ugly, they'll never forget it.
Elephants never forget.
I love bullying orphans. Who are they gonna tell? Their parents?
God's racist. He separated light from dark.
What do you call nuts on your chest? Chestnuts.
What do you call nuts on the wall? Walnuts.
What do you call nuts on your chin? A blowjob.
What's the best part about having emo grass?
It cuts itself!
What did the pornstar say to the unemployed homeless man?
Get a fucking job.
How do trees calculate square roots? They use log-arithms.
What do you call a cow that is really sad? Utterly Depressed. HEHEHEHE
When you have a bladder infection,
You're in trouble. 😜
What did Luke Skywalker say when he saw someone bullying his sister?
You better not lay a finger on her!
Don’t worry if you have a stroke.
You’ll be all right.
What country do French Fries come from? Grease.
Robin: "The car's not working."
Batman: "Did you check the battery?"
Robin: "What's a tery?"
Hell in Greek times was known as cold and misty... so now just look at Seattle.
In Portuguese, "Trumpa" means bullshit.
My friend threw a soccer ball at a disabled kid.
We all yelled "Rocket league!"
Why is sex like math?
You add a bed, subtract the clothes, divide the legs, and pray there’s no multiplying.