Why can't two Chinese people have a white baby? Because "two wongs don't make a white."
There was a guy who got his entire left side cut off. Don’t worry, he is all right now.
did you fall from heaven? or did you fall from the cliff up there?
If you drop an emo and a piece of paper from a tree which will hit the ground first?
The piece of oaper because the rope will stop the emo
Why can't disabled people make jokes.
Well, it's called Stand-Up comedy isn't it?
Why kind of experience does a feminist have? being a bitch
What's the difference between your jokes and your penis? Nobody laughs at your jokes
if a toy from toy story died, the kid wouldn't know and the other toys would just have to watch as their kid played with the corpse
Average Kid: brings mp3 to school
Rich Kid: Brings mp4 to school
Quiet Kid: Brings an mp5
My friend has a dry sense of humour
Probably bc her body was decomposed ages ago
Who is the king of Reddit? Sam Ryan
You know people always say your life is worth it, but with me it's worth-it-less
I asked my girlfriend if we could try my rape fantasy last night. She said no. It was the best night of my life.
Did you know my grandpa was part of World War 2? He killed Hitler.
I had a horrible nightmare yesterday. I was in room filled with all of my ex's, so I was completely alone.
I tried to explain to my 4 year old son that it's perfectly normal to accidentally poop your pants. -- But he's still making fun of me.
Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
Life is like a box of chocolates, mostly dissapointing
Can you imagine the last thing that went through the minds of 911 victims?
Well, probably their kneecaps.
Straight people ask why gays have such a good fashion sense. Baby we didn’t spend all that time in the closet for nothing.
