Short jokes
What is an orphan's favorite video game?
"Who's Your Daddy?"
I like my kids like I like my lamps.
Hung from the ceiling.
Joe Biden
What's the difference between Batman and a gay person?
Batman has no one to call "daddy."
What's the difference between you and an orphan?
Nothing.
Are you a school? Because I want to shoot kids inside you.
What’s the difference between Stephen Hawking and a refrigerator?
The fridge actually runs.
My pal asked me why nobody wants to eat the spaghetti he makes in his restaurant.
Well, because it's impastable.
How do orphans have a family reunion?
They use a Ouija board.
Why did I walk across the road?
To get hit by a car.
I like my women like I like my coffee: nice, fresh, and dead.
What do you call an epileptic kid on cocaine?
An earthquake.
What did the priest say to the other in the orphanage?
"Let us prey together."
Twin Tower jokes are funny because they are dead.
Why did Sally fall out the window?
She was pushed.
My Friend Evan: What happens if the voice inside your head is your soulmate?
Me: Then my soulmate is a F_cking A__hole.
What did the bird go to the hospital for?
For tweetment!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Mail man.
Mailman who?
Bitch, do you want your mail?
Why can’t orphans play poker? Because they don’t know what a full house is.
Go to an orphanage and tell a kid his parents came back.