Short jokes
Who's the fastest reader?
Me, 'cause I'll be jumping off so many stories.
What is an orphan's favorite event? Homecoming.
My mom asked me to stop making jokes about suicide.
I answered, "Don't worry... I'll stop soon."
Are you suicide, 'cause you're always on my mind?
An old lady in the bank told me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.
When you name yourself Twin Towers and Terrorist in Kahoot:
"Twin Towers" is on fire🔥
"Terrorist" is on a streak of 2.
Guys, we should stop making jokes about orphans. Their parents will get mad. Oh.... Wait... Continue.
Why did Susie fall off the swing?
Because she didn't have any arms.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not Susie.
What show does an orphan hate?
Family Guy.
I am a failure to everyone and decided to attempt a suicide, guess what? I failed.
The colors red, white, and blue are the colors of freedom. Until they are flashing behind you.
I have no friends, but then I realize my true friends are anxiety and depression.
I'd rate the food in Afghanistan a 9/11. That shit was bomb.
Why can orphans travel around so much? They never get homesick.
Without women, sex would be a pain in the ass.
What's a depressed kid's favorite holiday?.... Christmas because everything is hanging.
Why are there only 363 days in an orphan's calendar? They don't have Father's or Mother's Day.
What's the difference between puppies and orphans?
The puppies actually get adopted.
Me: Have you ever went sky diving?
Friend: No.
Me: Well don't, it sucks.
Friend: Why?
Me: They gave me a parachute and I lived.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed? Tell him to clap until his parents come home.