Short jokes
Go to an orphanage and tell a kid his parents came back.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Mail man.
Mailman who?
Bitch, do you want your mail?
What did the bird go to the hospital for?
For tweetment!
How does the author of Harry Potter get around?
She walks, JK, Rowling!
Why is September 11th the best birthday ever? No one forgets it :)
I saw a bicycler flip over a gutter. It was pretty grate.
Q) What is the ONLY zodiac sign ever to be surgically removed?
A) Cancer.
One day every kid at the orphanage got coal for Christmas. It was the second worst day of their lives.
Why do orphans not tell when they get hit?
Because who are they gonna tell, their mom?
What's the difference between an orphanage and a supermarket?
People actually want stuff in a supermarket.
What did the duck eat for lunch?
Soup and quackers.
Why did the orange fall off the tree? Because he went out on a limb.
Why did the cow wiggle?
To make milkshake! 😂😂😂😂😂😂
What was the last thing to go through the terrorist's mind? The detonator.
Why did the banana go to the doctor?
Because he wasn't peeling very well!
The terrorists lost their landing gear and had to make a crash landing into the closest building because religion.
So, if she gargles your cum, is that a jacuzzi daycare?
What do you call a disabled kid who is blind?
A grape chilli bean.
Don't be sad if you miss a shot when you yell "Kobe." He didn't make it either.
How do you know when Kobe Bryant is famous?
His face was chiseled in a mountain.