Short jokes
EVERYONE:
"My boyfriend, Danny, broke up with me. Can some hot guy come, so I can interview them and see if they wanna date me?"
Why do birds fly upside down over Poland?
There's nothing worth shitting on.
Your mom is so fat, she played bowling with the planets.
Baka!
Why are you sitting down to pee? I don't have a good back and can't lift something big.
What do squirrels eat at the fair? A-corn dog.
"Among Us" tea water.
The reason I love Stephen Hawking is because they roll off the tongue so nicely.
Q: Why don’t orphans have a personality?
A: They don’t have a person in reality!
Me: You know your parents were very good people.
Orphan: Wow, I didn’t know that.
Me: I know, you're an orphan.
Huh what you say?
Come fight me, suck a dick.
You're adopted, that's why your mom or dad never came back with the milk!
I said to the orphan, "Do you want me to take you to your family? Oh wait..."
A butt saw the toilet and said, "Shit, I'm sick!"
What has 15 arms, 9 legs, 8 heads, and 12 eyeballs?
A mosque after a missile strike.
My wife saw me hit the best drive yesterday with my golf clubs.
I must have drove that chihuahua 300 yards.
I love telling good news to my patients, like they survived the crash but their family died.
What kind of knickers is the best?
Windy knickers, because they're the best kind.
Best website ever 4 chair.
My mum told me to take you to the zoo and throw you in the lake, but I couldn't find you.