Short jokes
Guys, I guess with all these storms there was a power cut in his house.
Haven’t they switched him off and then back on yet?
What lives on the forest floor?
Forest Gump.
What do you do with a dog that has no legs?
Take him for a drag.
What do you get when you cross breed a woman and a horse? A neigh-ga.
Hey updog!
What's updog?
(Laughter)
My son.
What do you do with a broken bird? You re-parrot!
Q: What is the best Disney character?
A: Toe Mater.
Dean's sex life.
My existence.
How did Stephen Hawking become a billionaire?
He won the F1 Wheelchair race.
If it is someone's birthday, say this for a joke:
"A long time ago in a far away galaxy...
YOU WERE BORN!"
How Stephen Hawking died: he drove too far away from the wall and the cord got unplugged.
He died because he rolled too far away from the wall outlet and got unplugged.
Phone rings; "Are your parents home?"
Orphan; "Stop calling here!"
If you wear cowboy clothes, are you ranch dressing?
What camel has 3 humps?
...A pregnant one.
You're dumb, but that's not what she said.
My water was leaking, so I used Flex Tape. Now I don't know where to shower.