Short jokes
Your forehead is so big you can jump without getting hurt.
Why did God make the devils die?
God is great!
Why did Johnny cry?
He was molested by his sister. Johnny enjoyed it, though.
"Cancer isn't real. It's probably special effects."
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
What happens when you say, "Hey Siri?"
Stephen Hawking answers.
What is a definition of tight?
A. Putting a blind man in a round room and saying, "Your dinner's in the corner."
I impaled my son with a pitchfork...
He looks very sharp.
Why couldn't the button get off the couch?
Because his butt weighed a ton! (butt-ton)
Why do mountains contain things? Because their moun-tains.
My life...
SHAENAYA WANTS TO SUCK EVERYBOYS DICK BESIDES MINE CAUSE SHE A THIRSTY HOE.
Why is the homeless homeless?
Because it's homeless.
Why does Ella have cancer?
Because she’s stupid.
Gun + Backpack = Fun!
Why do elephants paint their toes red, blue, green, orange, brown, and yellow?
So they can hide in a bag of M&Ms.
Why did the bird lay an egg on Stephen Hawkings?
Because he is Stephen HAWKings.
What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and a baby?
Both of their legs don't work.
Once, there was a Minecraft child molester on the Minecraft Facebook. He asks a kid his age. The kid blocks him.
What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and Rocket League? You can't stand up.