Short jokes
I'mma monch ur nan's feet at 3 am tonight, ngl.
What did the officer tell the lioness after she said she was a dog?
Oooooooooh girl, you lion!
I'm in school right now, but I'm on an airplane.
What kind of punch hurts a kid the most?
A sandy hook.
What are the similarities between an American teen and an old Muslim man?
They both choose who they want.
Jasper likes little girls and Bin Laden.
A man walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!"
Why didn’t Stephen Hawking go to heaven? Because it’s a staircase, not a ramp.
Girls are like a bus; you might miss the first bus and catch the second bus.
Our family is known for unusually sloppy diarrhea.
It runs in our jeans.
Why didn't the skeleton want to make art anymore?
He didn't have the heart to put into it.
What is your true crush?
A soda crush.
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: It just felt like it.
Getting a book on pasta?
Yes. Just imagine the pastabilities there are!
Applesauce.
Yo mama so ugly, she had to ask Satan to help her give birth!
What did the guy with no teeth say to a blind guy... How many fingers am I holding up?
Muslims don't need weed, they've got the Koran.
You burn that sh*t and you're gonna get stoned.
Yo momma is so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas, and it's still printing.
What do you call a dog that's faced backwards?
A god.