Short jokes

Short jokes

Hell

A boy named Jimmy was riding to Hell to save his brothers and sister. That is the last place he pissed. There came across the Devil.

Part 1

Bot

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Reader

Whoever is reading this, I hope you have a good day because I feel bad you're so short.

Shit

When I shit in the toilet, I think that if I shit hard enough, I can see my asshole plug.

Pee

This shit is weird (as baby girl pees).

Dad: “Trust me, shitting is weirder.”

Orphan

Why can't orphans play baseball?

Because they don't know where home is.

Hotdog

Two hotdogs are walking across the street. One is walking slow. What does the 2nd one say?

"Ketchup!"

Banana

Why did a girl like bananas?

Because one day she might need to be ready.

Mom

Mom died, so I planted mums and forget-me-nots all over her grave site.

Cop

I really wasn't planning on going for a run today, but damn, those cops came out of nowhere!

Slavery

Friend: Slavery isn't good.

Other friend: Yeah, it's terrible.

Me: Shut up and get me a juice!

Girlfriend

Every woman will die in five seconds.

Mother: Dies.

Sister: Dies.

Girlfriend: Lives.

You: 🤬

Tornado

Q: What do a blond girl and a tornado have in common? A: There's a lot of blowing and sucking, then you lose your house.