Short jokes
What does the Catholic Church and Worstjokesever.com have in common?
They're both full of child groomers.
Orphan: Can I go outside?
Coworker at orphanage: Go ask your mom.
Orphan: WAWAWAWAWAW
What is a necrophile's least favorite game?
The Walking Dead.
According to a recent poll, your mother said, "I like the guy who saw the guy who doesn't have a brain!"
What's the difference between Lana Del Rey and Milli Vanilli?
Milli Vanilli won a Grammy.
Your friend is so fat, when he took the group pic, he was the background.
Me: What's the fifth month of the year?
Friend: May.
Me: May deez nuts fit in your mouth?
Me: How do cowboys say hello?
Friend: Howdy.
Me: How do deez nuts fit in your mouth?
Some of you need to go to church. I don't want you in hell with me.
Am I a guard or a guava?
The Lenovo computers at school stopped working.
They had to call an archeologist.
What do you call it if you find an old organ keyboard on the side of the road?
Organ harvesting.
Ever have an Italian sausage in a can?
Gay dik.
Smol Dik.
Plastik Dik.
Rubeh Dik.
Smooth Dik.
Metahl Dik.
What’s the difference between a life and a nuclear bomb?
I don’t have a life.
You got the whole crowd of people laughing when looking at you.
That face needing some laughing pills.
What did Eve say to Adam?
"That is rock hard."
A man walks into a doctor's office, naked and wrapped in Glad Wrap.
The doctor replies with: "I can clearly see your nuts."
Imagine. Kobe could not.
Did you hear that song about 9/11? It was a real banger!