Did you know your pupils are the last part to stop working when you die? They dilate.
Short Jokes
What do you call a line of men waiting to get haircuts? A barber-queue.
What do you call a beehive without an exit? Un-bee-lievable!
I can't take my dog to the pond anymore because the ducks keep attacking him. That's what I get for buying a pure bred dog.
I don't get why bakers aren't wealthier. They make so much dough.
I asked my wife if I was the only one she slept with. She said yes—the others were 7's and 8's.
Why was 2019 afraid of 2020?
Because they had a fight, and 2021.
What is Jimmy Savile's favorite Roblox game?
"Undress to Impress."
If at first you don't succeed, blame it on the patriarchy.
What’s the difference between a crossdresser and a trans person?
About 3 years.
There are 206 bones in the human body.
207 when I'm at a nursery.
Why isn't there a pregnant Barbie doll?
Ken came in another box.
WJE officially a gone memory.
Why did the rapper wear a watch to the studio?
He wanted to make TIMELESS TRACKS.
If a mentally challenged person shows up late,
Is it ok to call him tardy?
My doctor asked my brother if anyone in the family suffers from mental illness.
He replied: "No, we all seem to rather enjoy it!"
What's the difference between a casino and a church?
You actually mean it when you pray at a casino.
My cousin just broke up with her boyfriend, and I told her, "Since your dad owns a moving company, you can already take half of his stuff."
Your hairline goes so far back that it was getting whipped in the 1800s.
What's a kidnapper's favorite shoe? White vans.
