Short jokes
What is brown and sticky?
What is white and gooey?
What is long and hard?
(Tell me in the comments)
Ur mom.
Oh wait, you don't have one.
Riddle: I can fill a room, others can have me, but I can't be shared. What am I?
Answer: Loneliness.
Here’s my hand, please hold it. That way I can say I was touched by an angel.
Why do orphans hate p*rn hub?
They always see a stepdad and stepsis.
In case there's a school shooting, the teachers can help out and shoot the kids.
Snake one: Are we venomous?
Snake two: Yep!... Why do you ask?
Snake one: Cuz I just bit my tongue!!! (Drama scene)
What did the owl that's a detective say?
"Hoo did it?"
Roses are red, Your mum's a queer, Fucking hell, Can’t get out of first gear!
What do cows use for math? A cow-culator 😏
In the new Justice League movie, Flash can break glass by touching it, why is that?
Because Flash is not supported on Windows.
Why did the orphan start crying?
Because his apple found a home in his stomach.
I eat cockroaches.
The only time that cows will make noise is when they are in the moooo-d.
Your forehead is so clear, like the Liberty Bell manual in 1876.
What can you tell [as] a difference between [a] man and a woman [in a] relationship?
Both of them are just full of shit.
Normal person: "I'm perfect!"
Goth person: "Nobody is."
Johnny, Johnny. Yes, Papa? Eating dick? Yes, Papa.
I went to McDonald's and I saw a line of fat people because they were selling free hamburgers.
For every blonde in the world,
scratch and sniff at the bottom of the pool.