Short jokes
Do you know who didn't graduate high school this year?
The Parkland kids.
*School shooting happens*
Foreign exchange student: *Sobbing under desk*
American student: "First time?"
This person has Down syndrome.
Fell Sans: Welp, you're BONED!
Fell Papyrus: DAMN YOU SANS!!!
What did Michael Jackson find on his bed?
Billie's Jeans.
I give props to pedophiles.
They always go slow in the school zones.
What do you call a bulldog and a shih tzu? A bullshit.
How did the Scottish man find the sheep in the tall grass?
Satisfying.
What kind of jeans do you wear to church?
Holy jeans!
What's black and has wheels? Black wheels.
What's good about 9/11? It helped solve the world's overpopulation issue.
What did they call Susan B. Anthony when she was sleeping on the job?
Snoozin' B. Anthony!
Why'd Sally drop her ice cream?
She was hit by a bus.
Why can't America play chess?
They're missing two towers.
Gun control...
A gay guy asked me for directions, so I told him to go straight.
Why are school shooting jokes so funny?
Answer: The bullets hit your funny bone!
Not all self-harmers are emo, but all emos self-harm.
If I were in a staring contest with you, I would be looking at a rainbow.
What do you get when you put a baby in a box filled with glass and nails and push it down the stairs?
... A boner.