Short jokes
I'm autistic, and I find these so funny.
A student got a bad letter grade, so the next day he came back with his own letter grade in his backpack: an A-K47.
What did Sally say when she was stuck in the water with kelp?
"I need kelp! KELPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP"
School is a lot like boot camp. The only difference is that you don't have to get deployed to get shot at.
They finally made a movie about a clock, about time.
Have you heard about the corduroy pillow cases? They've been making headlines.
What do shemales and barns have in common?
Cocks.
What did Sally get for Easter?..
Nail polish.
What's the city with the fastest growing population?
Ireland, cuz it's Dublin everyday!
Communism jokes aren't funny unless everyone gets it.
What was Stephen Hawking's mother's name?
Ilean.
My doctor told me it was perfectly normal to become aroused or even ejaculate during a prostate exam.
That being said I wish he hadn't!
Why is Mrs. Grapes 🍇 a good mother?
Because she loves raisin' kids.
Why did the orphan cross the street? Because they thought that mommy and daddy was on the other side.
Teacher: What does a chicken give you?
Student: An egg!
Teacher: What does a fat cow give you?
Student: Homework!
Where do astronauts 👩🚀 keep their sandwiches 🥪?
In their launch box! 🚀📦😂
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
Because someone booted her in the face. 🤣🤣
It isn't a real charity until India opens call centers, like they did with Africa.
What is an astronaut's favorite part of a keyboard?
The SPACE BAR!
You smell like tap water and cornflakes.