I tried to pull (his/her) leg at the comedy club, but got arrested for sexual harassment. Does that still count as a joke? 🤣
Short Jokes
What does a duck and a tablespoon have in common?
Both are not a lamp.
How do you recover from prostate cancer surgery?
It’s all Depends!
What do you call a convict in prison for touching little girls? A boy named Brandon.
What's a popular name in China? Curiosity, because curiosity killed the cat.
Q: What does Pakistan love to do with India when they go to war?
A: Surrender their 93,000 soldiers.
Taking an emo kid grocery shopping does have its perks.
You get to scan their wrists for discounts!
What's the only good part of your crush dying before you have the chance to bang her?
She can't say no!
If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world.
I got a call from NASA. They’ve reached your hairline.
Just watched my friend take a steak out of her pocket. That steak was so outta pocket.
Why did the prostitute lose all her money?
Because she got f*cked.
What is an astronaut's favorite letter on a keyboard?
SPACE.
What do you call a Mexican Transformer? Optimus Juan!
What's the difference between dementia and a strawberry?
I don't know. I forgot.
What is big, black, and hairy? It's a gorilla with a machine gun.
Q: What can turn a fruit into a vegetable?
A: AIDS.
What goes pop pop sizzle sizzle?
Two dead babies in an acid bath.
I stole a wheelchair from a disabled kid. What is he going to do, stand up?
What is a suicidal horny person's job?
A butcher.
