Short jokes

I went to the bank to apply for a Personal Loan.

Then they found out I wanted to be a rapper, so they didn't want to Post M"loan."

Me: Knock knock.

Person: Who's there?

Me: No-one.

Person: No-one who?

Me:...........

What do ya call a legless prostitute in a strawberry field?

A jammy cunt.

Wanna hear a joke about Donald Trump?

Ok, Melania totally married him for his good looks, believe me!

Medusa makes men hard.

Why are you so bonely, my friend? I am at least glad that you are not boneless.

How did you get Sally into a blender?

- Without much resistance.

How do you get Sally out of a blender?

- Tortilla chips.

Yo mama so fat, when she joined Team 10...

It became TEAM, 10, TONS!

My dad was a roof cleaner and I'm dedicating this to him, so dad, if you're up there!

Will you remember me in 7 years?

(Yes)

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

A farmer counted 196 cows in the field.

But when he rounded them up, he had 200.

Sans: Pap, your spaghetti is bonearific.

PaprUs: Sans, no. Aw, your funny bone is not working; come on, that one was a rib tickler.

All dumbs aren't blonde.

What time is it when a nurse's here?

It's nurse-thirty.

Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?

Because they don’t have pockets. I’m

Son: Hey Dad, can I play Fortnite?

Dad: I don't know, do you want a girlfriend?

Why did the cloud apply to stormtrooper training school?

He mist.

So, no head?

God, people are so sensitive these days. You can't even say, "Paint the wall black," you have to say, "Jamal, could you paint the wall?"

What do a gay man and a tumbleweed have in common?

They blow and blow until they wind up on a fence in Wyoming.