Short jokes
Why was Helen Keller truly an inspiration?
She learned how to read and write despite being from Alabama!
Chuck Norris can toss Jupiter at the Sun with his bare hands.
And he still cannot win a fighting match against Bruce Lee.
The earth used to be flat.
Till they buried yo mama.
What's the difference between a refrigerator and a gay person...
It don't moan when u put milk inside.
What is the difference between an orphan and a cat?
The cat is actually cute.
What do you call a bowling ball that falls from the sky and knocks down all the bowling pins?
An airstrike.
What did Google Translate say to Siri?
"Why are you so Siri-ous?"
Tell your teacher this: "I passed a test that took 60 minutes. It wasn't your work, it wasn't my work, it was hour work!"
Do you know where time is? Because it keeps flying by.
Why is it called a building if it's already built?
Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says, "Can I have a drink of H2O?" Then the second says, "Can I have a drink of H2O2?" and he dies.
Quack, quack, quack, quack, quack, quack.
Confucius say, man who go through turn table is going to Bangkok.
Viagra is a lot like amusement parks...
It's a one hour wait, for a two-minute ride.
I once had clothes that were so unbearably uncomfortable,
but I never realized they suited me.
The eyelash and the lipstick got into a fight. Soon they will make up.
Play dead, they said.
Wasn't too hard.
I've been dead inside for years.
A weasel walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Wow, I've never served a weasel before, what can I get you?" "Pop," goes the weasel.
The lunch lady gave me only one carrot. I didn't carrot all.
Why didn't the drummer play?
Because he got a percussion.