Short jokes
What do you call people from Paris?
Parasites.
What do you call a dude that is always high and gets higher than everyone else in the family? The alpha pothead!
I don't have a joke, I just have a friend named Jack.
Ever seen twins?
If you said yes, was it before or after 2001?
You know why Santa's saying is "Ho Ho Ho?"
How else is he supposed to give boys and girls a baby brother or sister for Christmas?
Why did Jesus create the Devil?
He didn't recognize himself through the time portal.
Jesus lives on a long timeline, so he may seem slow to you.
You think on a airplane when a muslim guy gets on, people look at him and think... "Aw, fuck."
Did you know China wanted to send a dog to space?
They didn't because they ate it.
Now I know what my priest meant by the second coming!
To anyone suffering from low self esteem:
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/UTymDoPOEnY
A baby penguin sat on an iceberg. The baby penguin watched the Titanic sink.
Somebody keeps sending me flowers with their heads cut off.
I think I'm being stalked.
Your mama is so stupid that she put a ruler under her pillow to see how long she slept.
A few men have curved penises, but they can fix that problem by straightening it out.
I saw a helicopter on January 26, 2020. Then Kobe was on the news.
Why don’t Pakis play football? Because they only hold onto balls attached to prepubescent boys' cocks.
What did Jeffrey Dahmer say to the men he took home that said they were hungry? "I've got Ben and Jerry's in the freezer."
A sandwich is a sandwich, but a Manwich is a meal.
-- Jeffery Dahmer
I wish 9/11 was in December because the poor farm fields.