Short jokes
Blind people driving on the highway would be the world's biggest, and shortest game of bumper cars!
What do you call a tall terrorist?
Osama Bin Laden.
If I like having sex and get with 15 people, are they getting sexified?
Me explaining my child: when your mom is sitting on a table during her period, it's called the periodic table.
*True story*
I saw this guy with a very bad hairline who was painting himself blue and it said "Smurf Paint," but I shouted, "Megamind!"
Good morning everybody, well I could say that unlike emo kids.
What do you call a baby on the battlefield?
Free shield!
My mom said if I'm awake playing Roblox still, she said she was going to bang my head against the keyboard. hxhdhduhxbsfj.
What do you call a girl furry?
A pussy cat.
What do CG artists and porn stars have in common?
They both composite (cum pose it) at the end.
Your mom checked for your hairline, but she could not find it.
What do you call a blind and illiterate military leader?
Winston Churchill.
Did you ever see any white men drowning in the Atlantic Ocean?
Yeah, it went on and on.
If you got a priest, a Rhodes scholar, and a politician in a room, what would you get?
The Royal Commission.
Alternatively, Tony Abbott.
"Fuckin blakfellas be drunk all the time," slurred Barry McKenzie over his tenth pint of guiness.
What's the difference between a gun and a penis?
The American government does not define you as having the constitutional right to a penis.
What did the talking rope say to the man?
"Just hang in there."
A Russian wedding should be called a Soviet Union.
Why do Emos always wear black like ninjas?
Because they're always cutting.
Hitler was a good man because, after all, he did kill Hitler.