Short jokes
What does Trump stand for?
Trump Runs Underneath My Penis.
I got fired from my job today at a banana factory. They said to throw away the bad ones, so I threw away the bent ones.
What's an orphan's least favorite store?
Family Dollar.
You're so fat you sunk Captain Crunch's ship.
You're so fat your blood type is Nutella.
Woah man, you need to take a step back. Your hairline did, so I am sure you can.
Boy, if you don't get your "I'm Burger King with my Burger Queen!"
I'm dying... sike, I lied. You thought I died!
Bully: I wasn't talking to you.
Me: Then why are you listening?
I hope next time you ask your teacher to go to the toilet, your teacher says no, but when someone else asks, the teacher says yes to them.
I saw three people online on this site... Hope you guys will commit suicide tonight.
What are two plus sides to being an orphan?
1. All your snacks are family sized.
2. No one can make jokes about your mama.
Can you go as a horse for Halloween?
Well, if you do, I can't wait to ride you!
I had sex with my dog once, and my cat hissed at me for not doing her.
Why did the serial killer let the guy in a wheelchair go? Because the guy didn’t really have any body for the serial killer to stab.
When I saw a kid fall with no legs, I said, "Just walk it off!"
This kinda reminds me of when my mum was feeding me. She always used to say, "Open wide for the delicious plane."
Jenga.
This is why they don't want to sell the Double Manhattan in pubs anymore.
"That plane lookin kinda low."
What did the lady say when she sat on Pinocchio's face:
"Tell a truth, tell a lie, tell a truth, tell a lie, tell a truth!"