Short jokes
When this guy fell off a cliff, he got an A+ for egg-cellence!
What happened to the egg after it went on the rollercoaster?
It was scrambled.
What do you call a bad "egg" meme?
Deep fried!
A man walking on his roof, carrying an axe. He drops it on someone below him and says, "Sorry, it was an axe-cident!"
What do you need in order to crash a train?
A bad track record.
What do you call a blonde?
A piss-head.
How do you get a hippie chick pregnant?
You cum on her feet and let the flies do the rest.
My brother once froze a dollar in a block of ice. I called it "cold hard cash."
What keeps you breathing when you're on Earth?
I don't know. I suffocated at birth.
If you park your tow truck on the footpath, it'll get towed.
Yo mama is so slow, when she stepped on the highway they had to order a crane to come move her from starting traffic.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Boo.
Boo who?
Don't cry, it's just a joke!
kanker
What's the difference between leafmen and leafwomen? Palm trees.
Once a cheetah, always a cheetah.
Actually, it isn't a bear joke, but bear with me here...
What did Chris Brown say when he saw Rihanna?
"I'd hit that."
What would you call the Eiffel Tower if it falls over? The I Fell Tower!
A Nacho has a problem going on, and the Taco says to the Nacho, "Wanna taco 'bout it?"
And the Nacho says to the Taco, "It's nacho problem!"
What do you call a moose that doesn't want to be known? Anonymoose.